Image courtesy of Barbara A. Lane on Pixabay.com

If we’re personal friends on Facebook, you probably saw this post of mine from June 7:

This is not an event I had on my calendar. Indeed, the only reason we ended up at Duck Donuts in Bristow, VA that morning was simply by chance. Honest.

I haven’t always been a huge fan of donuts; really, for most of my life, I could take them or leave them.

The saying goes the older we get, the wiser we become. So if you are on the younger side, dear reader, let me impart some knowledge to you.

Wisdom Point #1: Losing weight becomes more difficult the older you are and (on the same thinking trajectory) gaining weight becomes much easier. Sadly, I decided I actually like donuts around the time the “harder to lose/easier to gain” stage kicked in.

Wisdom Point #2: We are what we eat. And that’s why eating donuts makes us round and fluffy. The hole in the donut’s middle represents the hole in our heads if we refuse to believe that donut eating poses a major threat to staying at a healthy weight.

I don’t believe there is one single positive aspect of a donut. At least with pumpkin pie or apple crisp we’re getting the benefit of some fruit. And we have to cross our fingers that the blueberry muffin on its way to our table is absolutely loaded with nutritious little balls of purple plumpness so that we don’t feel as guilty.

But donuts? Nope, sorry. The site Fooducate.com lists these ingredients for a Dunkin Donuts glazed specimen: DONUT: Enriched Unbleached Wheat Flour (Wheat Flour, Malted Barley Flour, Niacin, Iron as Ferrous Sulfate, Thiamin Mononitrate, Enzyme, Riboflavin, Folic Acid), Palm Oil, Water, Dextrose, Soybean Oil, Whey (a milk derivative), Skim Milk, Yeast. And then less than 2% of fifteen other items.   Whoops…almost forgot the glaze ingredients: Sugar, Water, Maltodextrin, Contains 2% or less of: Mono and Diglycerides, Agar, Cellulose Gum, Citric Acid, Potassium Sorbate (Preservative), Artificial Flavor.

ALL of this is why I think the next book written on healthy eating to control weight should be titled, “You Don’t Lose Weight by Eating Donuts.”

So imagine my surprise when I found two sites that mention both donuts and weight loss.

There is actually a diet called “the donut diet.”  The founders are not specifically pushing donuts. The idea behind this “diet” is that for two weeks you pick one food item you love and that would never be on a normal diet’s “allowable” list. Along with whatever else they want you to eat, you’re allowed one serving of this item per day and you have to agree not to feel guilty about eating it. This is supposed to “reset” your relationship with food.

Umm…no comment.

Then there’s a guy who swears he ate 500 Krispy Kreme donuts in two months and lost 20 pounds. It seems his wife worked at Krispy Kreme for a short period and employees got to take home a dozen donuts at the end of each day. The man ate all twelve each day.

He says he lost weight because when you eat a dozen donuts, you’re not hungry for another 24 hours. This concept sounds seriously dangerous so please do NOT try this!

As long as I’ve made you smile or laugh, I have no regrets about writing a blog post on donuts. Although I am sorry if you have a sudden longing for one.

In the profound words of Homer Simpson, “Mmm…donuts!”

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The Donut Diet

Story of the man who ate 500 Krispy Kreme donuts and lost 20 pounds in two months